How To Attend A Gig When Pregnant

28 January 2019

Can you go to gigs while pregnant? Yes, of course you can! Depending on how far along you are, you will have to adjust your plans accordingly. 

Did you book not knowing you were pregnant?

I did! If you email the venue, they may offer you an allocated area in 'Standing' or offer to move you to seated if the cost of the ticket is the same price (but honestly, when is it ever). 

Standing or Seated?

Even if you are very early in your pregnancy, I would advise to book 'Seated'. Even early on in your pregnancy, you will experience symptoms of pregnancy and tiredness could be one of them as well as frequent urination and back ache.

Need a wee?

Find out where the toilets are for the venue you are attending and if they are close to your location. Also consider where the disabled toilets are because more often than none, toilet queues can be out the door and you may find yourself queuing for 20 minutes if you cannot find anyone nice enough to let you squeeze in before you wet yourself. If you can locate the disabled toilets, please also check to see how you can access these as you may need to ask to use a key each time. It'd be worth it to mention that you will be going frequently.


If you are heavily pregnant, please ask to know the amount of steps you will have to walk to get to your seat if you have a Seated ticket. 


Most places won't allow you to bring in food or drink for security and safety reasons. Try to get your share of food and drink before queues begin to form but be weary that this may be inconvenient if you are standing and have many cups/bottles of drink and lots of food. This is also an inconvenience when seated so it might be a case of asking friends to get you your drinks when they go for theirs. Bottles are now given to you without caps which can be a nuisance if you are not drinking from it right away.

Ask for physical support

If you are going to a gig that has a capacity of a couple thousand, please do not be afraid to ask your friends for physical support like holding hands or linking arms. You'll find that all attendees will be pushing, squeezing, running etc especially at the end of the gig. So you'll find yourself being battered around at times, even aggressively. 

I hope this has helped! I attended the O2 Academy Brixton recently but will probably hold off from further gigs until after my baby arrives. Although the gig itself was incredible, I found the venue was not suitable for pregnant women. If I have missed out any tips, feel free to add yours below.

A Little Announcement

1 January 2019

I'm going to keep this short and sweet (like myself no?)

Myself and my partner are having a baby in Summer 2019!

I will try my hardest to document my journey as I want to be as honest as possible when it comes to pregnancy since I have found the internet to be very one-sided. Apart from social media, friends and forums - I have found information online very generic and unhelpful.

I didn't discover I was pregnant until about 5 weeks and strangely enough, it was my Natural Cycles app that told me I was with child. Whaaaaaaat? The app noticed my temperature was high and asked me to do a test. I've had my fair share of pregnancy scares (I mean who hasn't) so thought nothing of it so I did a test with a spare preggo test I had (don't lie - we all have a spare). Now that damn second line...

...faint as fuck it was.

I spent the majority of my Saturday looking like I'd lost the plot. I spent about 4 hours shouting at a stick of piss. Full-on conversation. I was hysterically crying and asking it...


This is because my second line was extremely faint but as the instructions read, if there is a line - THERE IS A DAMN LINE WOMAN.

(Disclaimer; not the actual words of FirstResponse)

My other half reacted much better than I did at first, but when we did our second test the day after and it bloody told me just how far along I was, his reaction was merely a simple and minimalistic...


Aside from our mental reactions (and let's not lie, how many of us react like that damn Clearblue advert), we were instantly in-love with our baby and there was no question about whether we wanted to keep it or not. Both of us are so in-love and are very family-orientated.

Sadly, we had to cancel our Christmas in Kenya due to birth defect risks from Zika and Malaria, and we lost a ton of money but we don't regret it at all.

I am now 14+3 weeks but it hasn't been smooth sailing.

Week 8, I had to go to hospital twice because of severe back pain that led me to going home sick from work and not sleeping for days. My hormones were and still are extremely high and my tiny frame meant that my body was struggling to change so much in such little space. This eventually went away after my mum gave me her emergency latex mattress topper and I bought a pregnancy pillow.

While I have only been sick 3 times and not really had morning sickness, I have been nauseous to texture and smells. At one point, I just burst into tears when my boyfriend asked me what I wanted for tea. I ended up surviving on miso soup with chopped veg because that's all I could stomach.

I have had little trouble since then until now at Week 14 where I am faced with crippling face and body acne (I look like I have leprosy) and a constant headache and if there is one thing I can't bear, it's headaches. Not to be a drama queen, but I once thought I was dying.

I do not handle headaches well.

So it's been agony lately with my never-ending gargoyle-ness and constant pain.

On top of this, I am still exhausted even though they say in your second trimester you have a burst of energy, and I'm trying to micro-manage my boyfriend (tip: buying Commando Dad and delegation is the answer).

Also for those on a tight baby budget, here are some good freebies to take advantage of which doesn't require you to sign your life away to a barrage of incessantly annoying spam emails from several different companies.

The Baby Box Co - Do a short video course and get a free baby box with free samples
Emma's Diary - Get up to 3 different baby packs with offers and discounts on baby stuff
Bounty - Get up to 3 different baby packs with offers and discounts on baby stuff
Cow & Gate Baby Club - Postal packs (including a pregnancy diary) and cuddly cow
Facebook Marketplace - This is a great way to find free baby stuff including brand new items that other mummies just want to get rid of

Can I also point out that if you're pregnant and less than 12 weeks, you can tell whoever the fuck you want. Let's fight this social stigma!

Handmade Happiness with The Yay Makers

30 December 2018

A little while ago, the people at The Yay Makers contacted me to review a box of theirs. The Yay Makers describe their box as 'a box of handmade happiness, wellbeing and creative wonderfulness'.

I love boxes like these because they are an instant pick me up. The colours and variety of products are uplifting not to mention they usually feature independent artists and sellers. If there's one thing I've really enjoyed this Christmas, it's the emphasis on shopping local and supporting small businesses and creators.

Some of the goodies included colourful pins, badges, some wellbeing tea, a gorgeous tote bag and a postcard with a heart-warming note. It also included some cute stationary such as a notebook illustrated by Lydia and a positivity pencil.

The Yay Makers are known for their pins and if it's those you're collection, they do a special pin subscription box for the collectors out there.

I think this box is amazingly uplifting and really useful. Any items you don't think you'll use are in a perfect condition to gift away too.

Brighten up someone's day with The Yay Makers.

Empowering Femininity with Project Lingerie

25 November 2018

The lovely Rowan from Project Lingerie reached out to me this year regarding promoting a new box to the UK subscription box scene.

Project Lingerie describes itself as a box to inspire women to feel body confident and the sticker for the packaging is described as a nod to female curves being sexy.

You can choose whether the box is for yourself or a gift for someone else and you have the option of one of three boxes; Delite, Deluxe and Divine in the sizes you require.

The Delite package offers cute knickers, the Deluxe is full of seductive pieces and Divine is boudoir themed. I was kindly gifted a taster box of what Project Lingerie has to offer and was delite-fully surprised.

The box came beautifully packaged in a letterbox friendly box wrapped in branded tissue paper and a premium gold sticker. Alongside this was a personal note and some cute sequins and gems in a mesh bag. The whole box came tied in a rich gold satin bow which made it all the more luxurious. 

The piece itself was a matching camisole set with thong. You get to choose your knicker preference upon setting up your subscription and for me, thongs are the way to go (and no I don't find it uncomfortable). The set was a mesh and lace piece with a gemstone at the bust and a low back. The lace was intricate and of high quality. What I find more often than none is that a lot of 'premium' lingerie brands use cheap lace - the type that resembles a curtain voile more than lingerie. 

I adore the message this box sends to women, that you can embrace your body and feel sexy in whatever. 

Project Lingerie starts at £14.99 a month with shop extras from £12. Sign up here to start your subscription.

Exclusive Giveaway with Kawaii Box

27 October 2018

Now we all know how quirky and fun the Japanese culture can be, from raw chicken dishes to crazy Sanrio characters that drink beer and listen to death metal. But I was still pleasantly surprised by the recent Kawaii Box that was sent to me to try.

Being Asian myself, I grew up with a lot of kawaii-inspired characters and trinkets so I loved the cute box I received in the very same familiar candy-colours as I grew up with.

The theme for this box was Too Cute For School. I love the Kawaii take on there original phrase 'Too Cool For School'. It consists of mainly stationary and a few added extras. I work in an office supplied by cheap stationary. You know the brand - Q Connect or something. So it's always a treat to receive quirky stationary.

I will be off to Japan myself in February to visit Osaka where my brother is getting married. I am extremely excited to experience the quirks of Japanese culture itself and try the incredible foods they offer. The Japanese culture is completely different to the Western and even Chinese culture which is one of the reasons I love travelling so much.

Now here comes the giveaway bit for all my readers. Kawaii Box have kindly offered to give their latetest box to one special reader.

Gotcha Tomotcha?

18 September 2018

Gotcha Tomotcha is my Japanese version of 'Got Milk'. I was sent two month's worth of Japanese tea to try from the lovely people of Tomotcha. After reading my blog, they had noticed my keen interest in tea. I have grown more fond and intrigued by Japanese culture as of late, as my older bother moved there about 5 years ago and I love hearing stories of his every day life out in the Japanese sticks (dunno what they would call it over there). He and his girlfriend recently visited over Christmas and she kindly brought some Japanese tea herself so I jumped at the chance to try a variation from Tomotcha.

I was sent Kabusecha and Tamaryokucha, how you pronounce these I'll never know - but a lot of a saliva comes out when I attempt to. I tried these both in the evening and was concerned it might keep me awake but surprisingly enough, it didn't keep me up all night like normal English Breakfast tea does.

The lovely tea on the left (Kabusecha) is described as mild and the one on the right (Tamaryokucha) is described as fruity. The Kabusecha is perfect for winding down before bed I found; I have a small glass cup of this tea (about half a mug) as it acts as a great night cap. The Tamaryokucha is better in the day and a great morning brew as you can definitely taste hints of berries. I tried both of these with different brewing technics, one in a teapot and another in a tea strainer. Both achieved the same quality aroma with a classic lime green colour.

I really enjoyed these two teas, you get a generous amount and the perfect amount of information to learn about what you're drinking. In the past, I've received teas with far too much information - and that's just the brewing instructions! This was incredibly refreshing to receive and I love that it comes in recyclable paper pouches. 
I would advise everyone to go check Tomotcha out! 

I fell in love with a narcissistic gaslighter

2 September 2018

I was in an on-off (x 10) relationship for two years that happened to be the worst years of my life. It didn't take me long to realise that I was in a two year relationship with a nightmare narcissist. 

His main exploitation was the use of manipulative gaslighting.

"Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation that seeks to sow seeds of doubt in a targeted individual or in members of a targeted group, making them question their own memory, perception, and sanity." 

The very first time his narcissism came to light was during an argument. I had said that he didn't like that I had a voice and that I spoke up against him when he did wrong. His response?

"You voice is too loud."

Like...who says that? That was an immediate sassy 'SAY WHAT' moment for me.

According to Psychology Today, there are 11 warning signs of a gaslighter; they lie, deny, attack the things important to you, wear you down, their actions don't match their words, use positive reinforcement, confuse you, project, align people against you and try to convince you everyone else is lying.


Often my boyfriend would lie to me, but the only time it was ever obvious was when he would admit to it. You see, you never really know if they're lying because they do such a good job denying it and making you doubt yourself. My boyfriend even said to me "I lied, I only said that to shut you up." I even found out about some of the lies he was telling his friends after I confronted them myself.

Once, he told me the TV we now shared was his ex's and had "fucked her loads in front of it". He then told me he had lied about that too. But had he? Here comes the confusion again, because if he had, then obviously that was bad that he lied. And if it was a lie, who in the right mind would make something so vindictive up to tell his current girlfriend?

During one of the ten times we broke up, he had joined several dating sites (and a German sex site) and of course, when we got back together - he lied that he had deleted them.


He told a friend of mine that he "fucking loves drugs" and that I was a dragon. How very passionate of you... *rolls eyes*. Obviously when this was brought up, he immediately denied this.

My boyfriend had also been flirting and courting another woman whilst we were together as I discovered in the late stages of our relationship. Not only did he hide our our personal Facebook posts from just her, but when questioned - he denied attempting to sleep with her and went on to say that "hooking up" to him meant "going for coffee".


Some of his actions made me feel inferior and disposable. Such actions includes times where he would go on a night out and tell me I'm disturbing his night and block me. He would also make initial engagements with friends for the weekend (the only time we get to see each other) and remain vague about his plans until last minute when he would cancel on me before I'm due to see him.

Affection is something he would withhold too and often this would happen very rapidly. It could go from being incredibly affectionate to not at all. One thing he said that really stuck with me was the fact that he was a man and isn't an emotional one at that. He said that he just fixes stuff for me and that should be enough. How archaic...

Actions and Words Don't Match

This was a big one for me and one of the most prominent things he would do in order to confuse me. This is what I believe lead me to take him back the 10 times that I did. He would do things like tell me he would try harder which would usually end after 2 days. He said he would never dream of "fucking me off" then breaking up with me less than a month later. After a fair bit of time apart, he came back to me (it's always him coming back to me) and invested a hefty amount of time and effort convincing me that he was serious about the relationship, only to say "let's not rush into things".

Things like "better communication" was promised but then I wouldn't receive a call until 2 hours after we agreed which might not be a biggie for you, but at this point he had moved to Saudi Arabia to pursue his lifelong dream of earning big dolla by building war planes to bomb innocent civilians in Yemen. Morals eh...

He also had double-standards, during one of the many times we broke up, we were no longer speaking. Yet when we got back together he was mad at me for not asking how his dad was. I'm sorry but I wasn't just going to text a narc gaslighter who I've been trying to break free from out of the blue to ask how his pop is. During the Manchester Bombing (which happened to be where I lived at the time), he never text me to ask how I was, nor did I expect him to. Then he had the audacity to tell me that he had enough problems and didn't need to hear about mine. He has even called me selfish for talking about my feelings.
Image result for gif what do you want notebook


Countering is where the abuser would make the victim doubt themselves by countering their recollection of events or statement.

We decided to go on holiday to Egypt as one last attempt to fix our deadly relationship. We had fallen out and he told me to book a different room in the hotel. He then tried to convince me it was myself who suggested it.

He had also once forgotten I had gotten a new job and then accused me of not telling him when in fact I had told him several times.


This is essentially words and actions to make you doubt yourself. This is extremely powerful and could find you bowing down to the abuser if you're not careful. He would often make me feel to blame for my own emotions.


The combination of narcissism with gaslighting behaviour makes your escape so much harder. These are just some examples of his behaviour.

A keen traveller, he always thought he was superior because he was apparently more worldly than most and his experiences always crept into conversations.

He would refer to himself in third person, and often uses his full name.

He asked me how it felt to "touch Caesar"

He would use degrading and derogatory language in reference to me. I was often referred to as "mate" or his "bird" which I do understand to an extent when lads speak to one another but this was communicating with myself. He also said he would "blitz" me. If it's anything like the German bombing offensive in 1940-1941 then no thanks hun.

He signed off emails to me with his name as a hashtag.

Said he owned me and that I was his possession.

Told me that I was nothing and the worst woman in the world.

Tried to shut me up by holding his finger up at my mouth.

Called me a skid mark.

I was working full time and volunteering at a youth centre once a week and he would tell me that because I volunteered, it didn't make me into a better person.

He has previously told me I would never meet anybody else and that I was incapable of having a healthy relationship.

He once suggested doing cams online together so he could get more money.

One of the most significant and luckily one of the last incidences where he demeaned me was when we were on holiday, when I found out that he had slept with a prostitute. We were in and amongst new friends we had met on our travels but I was not being social after I learnt this new information. So he decided to bring our personal affairs to the pubic to humiliate me. Little did I know, he was about to stab me in the heart. He defended his decision to sleep with a prostitute by saying "A suck and a fuck for €50? BARGAIN!"

Harassment, Police and how it all ended 

I mentioned a few times that we went on holiday and that it was a rocky experience (not the country but our relationship lol). The final straw had to be in the taxi, on our return from camping in the desert. We had been arguing a fair bit, and I had spent a lot of time crying my eyes out and I even considered opening the door and running away at one of the motorway checkpoints. But it was at this checkpoint where I (and I guess he cracked). Throughout the whole holiday, he was obsessed with his phone. Using it to chat to friends and yet not say a single word to me. He would spend 15 minutes editing a photo of himself that he made me take in certain angles, only to miss the view he spent so long forcing me to take - because I guess the right filter was more important than the view itself right? I asked him to stop going on his phone at this checkpoint and as if he was doing it in spite, he whipped out his phone. I grabbed his phone and much to my terror he raised a fist at me.

After one last try, I built up enough courage with the support of my friends and Greater Manchester Police and ended all contact with my now ex-boyfriend. But it wasn't plain sailing...

I had contacted the police way before our relationship had ended because of the harassment I was receiving when we had broken up. He would turn up at my door all the way from Wales in the middle of the night, he would find out what events I'm going to and turn up, he would contact me by calling me, texting me, Whatsapp-ing me, Facebooking me, calling from withheld numbers from Saudi Arabia, calling me from his friend's numbers and he would do it constantly. He even turned up at my door at midnight from Saudi Arabia. I had police case numbers and Domestic Violence files but he kept at it. He rang me from Saudi Arabia one night and whispered down the phone "I will always find you, I just have to be creative." I would have panic attacks in my sleep and wake up trying to scratch my own skin off or I would run to the door to check it was locked.

I was suffering and in so much pain.

I was referred to therapy to deal with my trauma and I couldn't have been happier with the results. I was finally free.

I am not a stupid girl, but I can't help but feel stupid. None of my friends felt comfortable around him, and they watched me suffer for two years while I got my heart attacked.

They were trying to save me but I never listened to them and often would hide the relationship from them.

Whilst I was with my ex, I lost my soul and lost my job through the depression.

His behaviour affected the start of my next relationship, I refused to believe this new relationship would be any different to the horror I experienced.

I was mistaken.

I am now madly in love with the man of my dreams, my best friend - my soulmate. He is not THE one, we ARE one.

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